Tales from The F Train Five forty five, Tuesday, November 7th, 2017

Can anyone truly allow themselves the allowance of the painful healing powers of surrender? Some run around searching for connections, some drink or eat more than they should; some are abusive pouring out their pain onto others as if conquering the sadness by causing others to feel it for them, from them. Some just go through time with distractions…They keep the noise surrounding them at all times - people, music, television, smart phones, computers...open the windows and let the noise distract us. At night, as one lays in bed, intrusions of inner noises such as memories or embellishments of one’s history. Rationalizations for the decisions in our lives we choose to avoid regretting or taking responsibility for. “It all happens for the best,” or the ultimate shirking of responsibility - “God is in control.” We close the door to those intruders whose aim is to disturb us from our dreams; so we close our eyes tightly and we force ourselves to be someone else, somewhere else…We sleep to dream and awake to the alarming sound that the time to dream has past.